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On Moving Towards

By: Shery Mead

I will start off by saying that all of the tasks of IPS are interrelated (meaning that you can't have one without the others).  This also applies to the principles.  That said, moving towards is the culmination of connecting, figuring out worldviews, and building mutuality.  In other words it is the result of a deepening conversation/relationship in which both people raise new possiblities.  Maybe an example would help.
 
Suppose I came to you and said that I was depressed.  You could start off by trying to problem solve with me about how to get out of my depression (moving away from), or you could spend some time with me trying to get to know me, understand where I was coming from, and at the same time introducing yourself and your understandings.  You might say something like, "Feeling depressed is a rotten place to be.  When I've felt depressed, this and that happened, is it like that for you?"
 
I might say yes or no but now we've got a better idea of what each of us experiences.  During this conversation you may also ask what its' like for me when I'm not depressed.  Without assumptions, you also might ask if that is a preferable place to be (if it was me, I might say something like, "I have to tell you that being depressed is a habit that i can get stuck in").
 
If that is something I can relate to, now we have changed the conversation from one about "getting out of depression" to one of the advantages and/or disadvantages of being "in depression."  This leads us to moving towards, or having a conversation that neither one of us could have predicted and one in which we both come away with feeling like we have new options and even new ways of thinking.
 
So just to reiterate, moving towards is tied into connection, worldview and mutuality and should not be thought of as a separate entity.